Starting Today, Edward's a Host!
by DBZfangurl47
Summary: Undercover as a student in Ouran Academy, Edward quickly finds out the girl he's supposed to gather info about is a regular costumer at the Host Club. In order to complete his mission, he has no choice but to become a host himself. Cross-over, OCs, possible Royai and/or Parental!RoyEd
1. Chapter 1: The Mission

_STEH Chapter 1, The Mission_

* * *

An early, spring Wednesday afternoon, Edward Elric strolled into Central Command, heading toward his superior officer Colonel Mustang's office. There weren't many soldiers around; Ed figured he had come right in the middle of lunch break.

Walking through the long, nearly empty halls, Ed sighed, wishing he could be anywhere but there. It had been relatively peaceful that morning; he and his younger brother had nothing to do until their train left the next day, so Ed had slept in late, and Al had spent the morning reading. Then, interrupting the serenity (and Ed's slumber), the colonel had called, ordering Ed to come to his office immediately.

Finally reaching the office, Ed shoved the heavy door open and quickly noticed Riza Hawkeye was the only one in there. Hearing the door open, the lieutenant looked up from her work and turned around in her desk chair to face him.

"Hello, Edward. How are you?" she greeted with a smile.

"Hey, Hawkeye. I'm good, you?" Ed replied, smiling back as he continued to walk toward the colonel's inner office.

"I'm doing well, thank you." Riza said, turning back around. She watched Ed stride over to the Roy's door and suddenly kick the door open with a loud _slam_! The lieutenant shook her head with a sigh. She knew he would do that, he always did. It used to scare the crap out of everyone in the office, but over the years they'd gotten used to it.

Roy didn't look up from his work or even flinch when Ed kicked his door open, adding to the ever-growing dent it the wall where the handle hit, then sauntered in, a satisfied smirk on his face. Ed stood in front of the colonel's desk with his arms crossed, but his superior refused to acknowledge his presence.

"Hey," Edward said loudly with annoyance, "I'm here. So what do you want?" Roy finally looked up and raised his eyebrows slightly in mock surprise.

"Oh, Fullmetal. I didn't hear you come in."

Ed rolled his eyes with an irritated sigh. "Look, just tell me what I'm here for so I can go back home." Roy sat up straighter and began looking through a stack of folders on his desk. After a moment, he pulled one out and opened it.

"Well, Fullmetal, I have a mission for you." he told the fifteen-year-old.

"What?!" Ed immediately exclaimed, "But Al and I have a train to Liore leaving tomorrow morning! Can't someone else do this?"

The colonel grinned, "Sorry Edward, but you're the only one in the entire military who can do this mission." Ed's blonde eyebrows lifted in surprise.

"Really? I'm the _only_ one who can do it?" he asked curiously.

"Yes, the _only_ one. Now listen carefully." Roy instructed as Ed sat on one of the couches in front of his desk. "This mission includes undercover work. You, Lieutenant Hawkeye, and I will be working together, posing as a family; Hawkeye and myself as the parents and you as our son. I don't know why _I_, a _colonel_, have to go undercover, but it's the Fuhrer's orders."

"Probably 'cause the Fuhrer wants to see if you can still do something after sitting on your butt in an office for years." Ed suggested with a smirk.

Roy glared at the teenager and continued. "_Anyway_, in a town north from here, there is a wealthy family, the Connor's, who own a weapon-making company. The Fuhrer has a hunch this company has been supplying the Drachmans with weaponry, but he needs to find out for sure. We will spy on this family and try to gather evidence. Since the Connor's daughter is your age and attends a rich private school called Ouran Academy, you will be enrolled there as an honor student."

"I'll _what_?!" Ed shouted, slamming his fist on the armrest of the couch. "There's no way I'm going to _school_!"

"Yes, you are. The orders come directly from the Fuhrer." Roy informed him with a smug grin. "Now, I wasn't finished. Your main job will be to befriend this girl, get as close to her as you can so you can find out as much as possible about her family. While you are in the school, you, Hawkeye, and I will be able to keep in-contact with an earpiece." The colonel stopped to hand Edward a pale yellow folder. "There are more details in here."

Edward opened the folder and skimmed over the papers, only committing the important parts to memory. _Honor student in Ouran... Keep first names but use the last name "Coleman"…More stuff about the school, some stuff about the Connor's, blah blah blah. This whole thing looks stupid and a waste of time. Al and I have much more important things to… wait a sec._

Ed immediately looked up from the papers and voiced his thoughts. "Wait, what about Al?"

Roy looked reluctant to answer, but finally spoke. "Alphonse... can't come."

The teen reacted just how the colonel figured he would. "What!? Why not!?" he demanded.

Roy sighed, "Because, Fullmetal, think about it. We will be acting as a normal little family. Normal families don't usually include boys in suits of armor."

"So?! We can… he can stay hidden! No-one will even know he came!" Ed argued, trying to think of a way his brother could come with them.

"Edward, would your brother really want to stay cooped up, hidden inside, for the entirety of the mission? And how do we get him from the train station to the house? It's going to be hard enough to keep the great Fullmetal Alchemist's identity secret, but don't you think the big suit of armor accompanying you would be a dead giveaway? He could blow our cover, Ed."

Ed took a quick breath, ready to yell back, but couldn't think of a valid comeback and slowly let the breath out in a sigh. "…Can I at least call him?"

Roy nodded his head, "Yes Edward, you may call your brother during the mission." Ed looked relieved to hear this. "We will be leaving in two days, on Friday. I expect you to be at the train station, packed and ready to leave, at exactly 7:00AM."

Ed groaned. "I have to be there _that_ early?" he complained, looking as if just the thought exhausted him. Roy sighed and shook his head. _Typical teenager_, he thought.

"Yes, Ed. Seven isn't _that_ early, you know."

"Fine. I'll be there at seven." Ed grumbled.

"Good." Roy turned his attention away from Edward and back to the stack of papers on his right. "You are dismissed."

* * *

Friday morning, Roy stood at the Central Train Station entrance, tapping his foot and constantly looking at his silver pocket watch.

"Seven oh five," he announced angrily, "I told him seven o'clock on the dot."

"I'm sure he'll be here any minute." Riza assured him.

"He'd better be!" Roy yelled. But it was nearly fifteen minutes later when Roy spotted Ed and Al running toward the train station. Ed stopped in front of the colonel and bent over with his hands on his knees to catch his breath.

"You're late." Roy growled. Ed frowned up at him.

"Yeah, I know that." he said between gasps, "Why else do you think I _ran_ here?"

"I told you to be here at seven, it is now _twenty_ after! Why is that? Is your clock too high up on the wall for you to read it?" Roy asked with sarcasm.

Ed bolted up straight. "Who are you calling a tiny speck of dust that only be seen with a microscope?!"

The two continued to argue while Al tried to stop them, and Riza could only shake her head. It was only early morning and the two were already at each other's throats. She couldn't even imagine what the nine hour train ride would be like.

"We're going to miss our train." She stated loudly. All three heads turned toward her.

"Well, we'd already be on the train if _someone_ hadn't been late." Roy said, glaring at Edward.

"Well, _you_-" Ed started to yell, but Al stopped him.

"Brother, please!" he said, reaching out and putting a hand on Ed's shoulder. "You don't have time to argue, you have to go." With a growl directed at the colonel, Ed turned around to face his little brother.

"Yeah, you're right. So, I guess this is goodbye for now."

"Try to be careful and take care of yourself while you're gone!" Al said.

Ed rolled his eyes and grinned. Whenever the brothers were separated, Al worried himself sick the entire time. "Al, I'll only be gone a few weeks. I'll be fine."

"I know," Al said softly, and lowered his head. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you, too." Ed stepped closer to Al and wrapped his arms around his waist, resting his head on the cool metal as his brother's arms encircled him and hugged gently. After a moment he let go, picked up Ed's suitcase and handed it to him.

"Bye, Brother!" He said with a small wave as Ed started to walk away.

"See ya, Al!" Ed waved back over his shoulder, then jogged a few steps to catch up with Roy and Riza, who had already started toward the train.

The trio boarded the train and selected two long seats facing each other. Roy sat on one seat at the end, Riza sat on the other next to the window. Roy pulled out a newspaper and decided he would ignore Edward the entire train ride.

Ed plopped down next to Riza and gave her a smile.

"Hey," he greeted.

Riza smiled back. "Hello, Edward."

Ed sat quietly and gazed out the window as the train started and pulled out of the station. After a few minutes of sitting there, he bent down and pulled out his suitcase, took a book out of it, and slid it back underneath the seat.

Ed slouched in his chair and propped his feet purposefully on Roy's lap, crinkling the newspaper he was reading. Without a word, Roy grabbed Ed's ankles with one hand and dropped his feet back to the floor. Ed immediately put them back on top of Roy's paper. He heard an irritated sigh come from Roy, and hide his smile behind his book. Once again, Roy shoved Ed's feet off of him, and straightened his newspaper. Ed's feet were back in the colonel's lap not even two seconds later, this time, tearing the newspaper. Roy slammed the paper down next to him and threw Ed's feet forcefully to the floor.

"Cut that out, Fullmetal!" he barked.

"Cut what out?" Ed asked with fake innocence.

With an exasperated sound, Roy slid over on the seat so he was next to the window and in front of Riza. He picked up a section of the newspaper that wasn't torn and continued reading.

Ed went back to his alchemy text, but grew tired of it fairly quickly. Like many alchemy books, it only repeated things he already knew. Unfortunately, that was the only thing Ed had brought to occupy him on the train, so now he was stuck with nothing to do. He checked his pocket watch; it was only eight o'clock, and they didn't reach the town until four thirty at the earliest. Ed sighed and propped his head up against his fist with his elbow on the armrest.

"I'm bored." he declared.

"So entertain yourself." Roy answered, without even looking up.

"Gee, _thanks_. That helped a _whole_ lot." Ed replied, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Be quiet, we're reading." Roy told him.

Ed slumped in his seat with an exaggerated groan. He crossed his arms and sat there, looking around the room for something to do. He sat up a little straighter and started playing with his braid. He pulled it over his shoulder and braided the little section of loose hair at the end over and over. Then he undid the entire plait and re-braided it. Then he did it over _again_. He grew tired of that quickly.

Ed slouched again, and when he did, a few strands of his long bangs fell across his nose. He blew a puff of air at the hair and watched as it flew up, then right back down to where it was. He blew again. And again.

"Stop it," Roy snapped. "That's annoying."

"I'm not doing anything." Ed grumbled.

"Yes, you are. You're being annoying." Roy repeated.

"What, I can't _breathe_ now?" Ed retorted.

"Quiet," Riza ordered.

Ed's mouth immediately snapped closed and Roy quickly returned to his newspaper.

Edward crossed his arms and slumped in the chair again. He decided to look out the window, but quickly discovered from his slouched position, Riza was blocking his view. Not feeling like sitting back up, Ed stayed how he was and pretty soon became lost in thought, thinking about the mission. He wondered what the house they'd stay in would look like, and how big it was. He wondered about the school he'd be going to, what it was like, and if it'd be any fun.

Suddenly, his head nodded down and he jerked it back up, snapping his eyes open. He didn't even remember closing them. Ed sat up ramrod straight and tightened his crossed arms over his chest, stubbornly refusing to fall asleep. A few moments later he caught himself nodding off again. Giving up trying to stay awake, he snuggled down in the seat again, closed his eyes, and quickly fell asleep. Minutes later, the train bumped and jostled Ed's sleeping form, causing him to fall to the left.

Riza turned from her book and looked to her side when something leaned against her arm. It was Edward, fast asleep. She bent down a little to see him and smiled at his peaceful sleeping face. Just then, the train bumped again and Ed started to fall forward. Riza quickly grabbed him and gently pushed him back against the back of the seat and he leaned back into her arm. Realizing he would just fall again, Riza set down her book and began to carefully shift Ed's position. Holding onto his chest with her free hand, she moved the arm he was leaning on around his shoulders. He was now slumped against her side and she was holding him secure. Riza smiled again when Ed subconsciously snuggled into her and sighed softly.

"It's about time." Roy spoke up quietly. "I was hoping he'd just sleep most of the ride." Riza nodded in agreement and looked back down to the softly snoring boy.

"Hopefully, he will." she said.

* * *

"So, this is our new home."

Ed now stood in the doorway of the home he'd be staying in with Roy and Riza for the next few weeks. The train had arrived at the station right on time, and the group had gone grocery shopping before heading to the house, which was already furnished and everything, all they needed was food.

Roy walked pass Ed, arms loaded with bags of food. "Well, for now it is. Go take your things upstairs and come help us with the groceries."

Eager to see the second story of the house, Ed obeyed and ran up the wooden stairs, skipping every other step.

At the top of the stairs was a short hallway leading to a door in front of him, one to the right, and two to the left. Ed opened the door in front first and discovered it was a bathroom. Next he tried one of the rooms to his left. It was a bedroom that he guessed was meant for him.

The whole room was decorated in either light or dark green: light green walls, dark green bedding, and dark green curtains. It had dark wooden floors, the same as the rest of the rooms upstairs, and a white door that lead to a small closet. Except for the bed and dresser, both made of a similar shade of wood as the floor, the room looked bare.

Ed sat down on his bed, setting his suitcase on the floor and looking around the room. He wrinkled his nose in disapproval. _Too much green,_ he thought, _Al would like it, though._

Leaving his suitcase on the floor, Ed walked to the closet across the room and opened it. Inside he found two sets of black dress pants and two light blue blazers with the Ouran crest on the chest pocket. He frowned at them, not please that he'd have to dress so formal just to go to school.

"Stupid rich people and their uncomfortable fancy clothes..." he muttered, closing the closet door.

"Ed! I told you to come help down here!" Roy yelled from downstairs. Ed rolled his eyes but did as he was told.

He ran down the stairs, jumped off the bottom few steps and jogged out the front door. He headed toward the open back of a black car, much like the one the colonel usually drove, parked in their driveway. Ed grabbed two bags in each arm and went back into the house. He walked through the short hallway that led to the kitchen/dining room at one side and a living room at the other.

In the kitchen, Riza was busy putting things away and Roy was heading back to the car for more groceries. Deciding to let Roy do the harder work, Ed stayed in the kitchen to help put the food away.

"What's dinner?" he asked Riza as he pulled apples out of a bag and set them on the counter.

"What do you want?" Riza asked in reply.

Ed thought about it as he put the apples in a fruit rack on the counter. He grabbed another bag and the first thing he took out was the package of chocolate chip cookies he'd insisted on getting.

"These?" he asked with a grin, holding up the cookies.

Riza smiled, "Those can wait until after dinner."

Edward returned to the bags of groceries and quickly found two big boxes of macaroni and cheese. He held them to Riza and raised his eyebrows. "This?"

Riza nodded. "Alright, but do we need two boxes?"

"Hawkeye," Roy said as he walked into the kitchen, carrying the last of the groceries. "Have you _seen_ Fullmetal eat? It's like he has a hollow leg."

Ed grinned, taking one of the bags from Roy. "Nope, just a metal one."

* * *

An hour and two heaping bowls of macaroni later, Ed returned upstairs after exploring the rest of the downstairs. He'd found the downstairs was boring; he'd discovered nothing but another bathroom and a laundry room in addition to the kitchen and living room he'd already seen.

Ed walked into his bedroom and sat down on the bed. He considered just going to sleep then, but he knew he had other things to do first, like unpack and call Alphonse.

Ed smiled at the thought of his younger brother. He knew if he didn't call soon, Al would call him, all worried that something crazy had happened, like the train had crashed, or train bandits were holding them hostage, or aliens that happened to be on the train had abducted him.

Still grinning, Ed got off the bed and knelt on the floor in front of his suitcase, deciding to unpack first, before calling Al so he wouldn't forget. He opened the old, worn suitcase and started taking out clothes and putting them in the drawers of the dresser.

After cramming half his suitcase's contents in one drawer, Ed noticed something in the suitcase, underneath his favorite pair of pajama pants. Moving the pants, he found a small, gray and white stuffed kitten, one that he had made himself years ago. This was Alphonse's beloved Socky, who was named for its white paws that looked like socks. It was a Christmas present Ed had made with alchemy and given to him when Al was only nine years old.

From the day he got it, Socky went with Al everywhere. It had even gone to Teacher's during alchemy training, and now it often accompanied them on long missions. Ed could recall waking up to find Socky curled in his arms or against his side during hard nights after automail surgery and the few times he had landed himself in the hospital during their quest for the Philosopher's Stone.

Edward smiled and gently lifted the toy from his suitcase. Right where the kitten had been sitting, he spotted a piece of paper. He picked it up, knowing it was a note from his brother before he had even looked at it. Written in Al's neat handwriting, it said:

"Dear Brother,

Since I can't be there, Socky will take care of you while you're gone. He can help you sleep better if you have nightmares.

Love,

Alphonse"

And next to Al's name was a small drawing of a smiling cat.

Later that night, when Riza peeked in Edward's room to see if the boy had gone to bed yet, she smiled at what she saw. Ed was curled up in bed, with the blanket only up to his waist, and a gray-and-white stuffed cat tucked under his chin.

* * *

**AN: ****_MAN_****, I've been dying to finish and post this for a long time! I started it a good few months ago. At first, this was going to be two separate chapters, but I thought they were too short so I put them together. (This is the longest thing I've ever written, almost 4,000 words!) Unfortunately, it may take awhile for me to post the next chapter. I originally planned to wait until the whole thing was finished, then post a chapter a week or something like that, but that would take way too long and I'm just to eager to post it!**

** So anyway, this is what happens when I read Another Run of Events by 0-mirage-0 (Which I highly recommend, like my fave fanfiction ever.) and Ouran HSHC manga. I've read a few fanfictions where Ed goes undercover in a school (two that I can recall), and I got to thinking, What if he went undercover in Ouran Academy? And the idea wouldn't leave, so I wound up with this. **

**So, since Ouran and FMA are in like completely different universes, here's what it's like in this story. Ouran Academy is in Amestris, (Not in Japan) in some random un-named town that may or may not be named later. The town is near the Amestris/Creta(?) boarder so that's why the hosts and other students have foreign names. ( 'cause they like, moved to Amestris or something… lol kind of made that up last minute. Doesn't make too much sense but whatever. XD) Also, the story is FMA time: early 1900's. Why? 'Cause I wanted them to ride a train to the town, that's why. I like trains. :D And if they didn't have communication ear piece thingys back then, they do now. XD**

**Oh, and Ed mentioned they were supposed to be going to Liore. That was just because I needed a town name and that was the first I thought of, but it could actually work. I haven't given the specific time of the series this takes place much thought, but let's say this is around the time of the beginning of Brotherhood, like after the Freezer Alchemist thing (ep. 1) but before Liore, which is where they went after that.**

**Who remembers Socky from my story Christmas with the Elrics? Anyone? …No?**

**Also, two more things: if anyone has a better title, I'd love to hear it. No so fond of this one, but it's all I could think of. And the cover picture is just the rough sketch (drawn by me) so far, I haven't finished it yet.**

**Please leave me a review! I'd love to know what you think or if you have any tips for me to improve. Just please, no flames. Be warned, I stole Roy's gloves so I can flame you back! ;)**


	2. Chapter 2: Where's Brooklyn?

Chapter 2, Where's Brooklyn?

"For the _third_ _time_, Edward, get out of bed or I will _drag_ you out of it!"

It was Monday morning, Ed's first day undercover in Ouran Academy. The weekend had gone by quickly, but it was, in Edward's opinion, boring. The only thing slightly interesting they had done was visit the school and meet the principle on Saturday.

Roy stood over Ed's bed, arms crossed, glaring down at the lump under the blankets as it let out an irritated groan. A barely audible "Leave me alone," was mumbled soon after.

The colonel sighed loudly and uncrossed his arms. "I'm counting to three." he warned.

Edward didn't move from his curled position under the covers, though he knew what Roy's threat meant. It was an old one the colonel had used before, and it was even used by his own mother years ago. If Ed did not do as he was told by the count of three, there would be consequences. But he hated when Roy used tactics like that, it was degrading and Edward did not like being treated like a child, so he ignored the colonel.

"One," Roy started.

Ed stayed stubbornly still.

"Two,"

He was still frozen and dead silent.

Roy paused longer this time, waiting to see if Ed would react.

"Three!" he shouted and yanked the bedspread off the boy. He was about to forcefully drag him out of bed like he said he would, but Ed sat up quickly before he had the chance.

"_Okay_, okay, I'm up! Now get _out_!" The teen screamed as he chucked pillows at Roy.

Roy blocked the pillows easily with his arms as they were hurled at him. "You're going to be late, Fullmetal. You have to be there at eight and it's already 7:15. Get a move on!"

Ed glowered at his commanding officer and again refused to move from his bed. The two held a silent staring match for a few moments before Roy spoke.

"I'm not leaving until you get out of bed."

Edward huffed angrily and stood quickly from the bed. "I'm _out of bed_," he said, gesturing to himself in an exaggerated motion. "Now _leave_."

Roy rolled his eyes, but headed out of the room anyway. "Next time I tell you to do something, you better do so the first time." He stopped in the doorway and smirked over his shoulder.

"If you don't, I'll be showing that photo of you sleeping with a stuffed toy to everyone in Central Command."

Ed froze and his jaw dropped open as he gaped at the colonel's retreating back. "_You took a picture_!?"

"Hawkeye did!" Roy called back cheerfully, and locked himself in his bedroom before Ed had time to come after him.

* * *

It didn't take long for Ed to take a quick shower and get dressed, and after a short while, he was on his way downstairs.

Just as he entered the dining room, Riza set a plate of scrambled eggs and toast, and a glass of apple juice at Edward's place at the table. Ed greeted her with a smile as he sat down. "Looks great, thanks!"

"You're welcome, Edward." Riza replied, setting a bottle of ketchup in front of him. "Did you sleep well?"

"Like a baby!" Ed said as he drowned his scrambled eggs in ketchup. "That is," he continued when Roy walked in the kitchen. "Until Colonel _Jerk-face_ woke me up at the crack of _dawn_."

Roy rolled his eyes for the second time that morning as he took his place at the table across from Ed. "It was just before seven when I got you up, quit being so dramatic."

"Whatever," Ed said, mouth full of food. "I'm too tired to argue with you."

Ed's breakfast was gone in seconds, devoured quickly by his ravenous appetite. He spent the next several minutes as Roy made and ate his breakfast loudly complaining that the colonel was the slowest eater ever.

As soon as Roy was finished, Edward was at the front door, backpack in hand, and ready to leave.

Riza stopped the two before they could go out to the car so she could talk to Ed. She spoke to him in a motherly tone, reminding him to be kind to the other kids, and to watch his language, and most of all to remember the role he was playing and his part in the mission.

Ed nodded his head as he listened to her, but was only partially paying attention to what she was saying. "Okay, okay, I get it, Hawkeye! I know what I'm supposed to do and I'll try to behave." he said. He was bouncing on his toes, anxious to leave.

Riza sighed, but cut off her lecture anyway. "Alright," she said and reached down to straighten his collar, but her hands stopped before they touched his shirt.

"Wait a second, aren't you supposed to be wearing a tie?"

"No," Ed answered quickly. A little _too_ quickly.

Roy was now interested in their conversation. "Fullmetal, where is your tie? Why aren't you wearing it?"

"_Because_!" Edward snapped, "It's not important, let's go, we'll be late!" He turned toward to door by Roy stopped him with a firm hand on his shoulder.

Roy smirked down at him. "Is someone having trouble putting on their tie?" he teased in a patronizing tone.

Ed's cheeks started turning red. "_No!_ I just don't want it!"

"Edward, go upstairs and get your tie and Roy will help you put it on." Riza told him.

The boy's blush deepened, spreading to his ears. "_I don't want his help!_"

"Just go get the tie, Ed, we have to leave! That's an order!" Roy yelled.

"_Fine!_" Ed stomped up the stairs, into his room and snatched up his tie from the bed, then stomped back down.

"_Here_," he growled, shoving the dark blue tie at Roy.

Roy bent down in front of Ed then quickly and easily tied the tie around his neck.

"See? Simple. Now let's go."

* * *

After a short ten-minute drive, Roy pulled up in front of Ouran Academy. He helped Ed set up the small earpiece they would keep in-touch with and made sure his hair hid it.

"Alright," After learning how to use the earpiece, Ed reached for the car door to get out. "Let's go."

"Wait," Roy grabbed his shoulder to stop him. "What's your name?"

Ed groaned and rolled his eyes, but answered anyway. "It's Edward _Coleman, _which sounds really dumb. Now let's go!"

"Not so fast! What are you?"

"An honor student,"

"Not?"

"An alchemist,"

"You're in grade…?"

"_Tenth_, OK? I know my stuff! Let's go already!"

"Alright, fine. You better not screw anything up." Roy unlocked the car and the two got out.

"One more thing," Roy added as they started for the building. "You're walking to and from school from now on. I'm only taking you the first day because I'm supposed to look like a responsible parent."

"Of course, you only care about your image." Edward replied.

Roy glared. "I care about my cover, and the role I'm playing."

"Uh-huh," Ed said, not sounding convinced.

Once in the school, they were greeted by the vice principle, who gave Edward a map of the school and pointed him in the direction of his first class.

Ed looked back at Roy as he was walking away and watched his superior mouth the words 'Brooklyn Connor', reminding him of the girl's name.

As he walked down the halls to find his locker, Ed gained many curious looks. As he passed other students, he heard them whisper to each other, and the word "commoner" was heard more than once.

He wasn't sure if it was something about his appearance that made them realize he wasn't of higher degree, or if they had heard about his coming and assumed he was the new honor student.

He finally found his first class right when the bell rang. Before beginning the lesson, the teacher made Ed stand in front of the class in and introduce himself. Fortunately, Ed remembered at the last second to say "Edward Coleman" instead of "Edward Elric".

The morning passed quickly, and by lunchtime, Edward had still not seen Brooklyn Connor. He thought about this as he got his lunch and sat down at an empty table. Why hadn't he seen her yet? He was supposed to have the same classes as her. When he had asked Roy over the earpiece about this, the colonel said he just wasn't looking hard enough or paying enough attention.

_Maybe something got messed up and I was placed in the wrong classes…_ Ed's thoughts were interrupted by a boy who looked about his age sitting in front of him with a tray of food.

"Hi," the boy said in friendly voice. He had longish dark brown hair that fell in his big auburn eyes. "You're the new honor student, right?"

"Um, yeah?" Ed was so caught up in his thoughts he hadn't noticed the kid coming. He wasn't expecting someone to sit with him.

The boy offered his hand across the table. "My name's Haruhi Fujioka. I'm also an honor student here. Actually, the _only_ other honor student here."

"Oh, really?" Edward asked, shaking Haruhi's hand. He hadn't known there was only one other honor student at the school.

Haruhi nodded. "Yep. I'm only here because I'm an honor. I'm not rich like all the other students."

"Same here," Ed replied.

"Heard the word 'commoner' yet?"

"Multiple times," Ed said, rolling his eyes.

"Well, I recognized you from earlier, we're in a bunch of classes together, and I figured I'd come over and introduce myself since you were all by yourself." Haruhi explained.

"Oh…thanks." Ed replied awkwardly, not sure how to respond.

The brunet was quiet for a few seconds and they ate in silence until he continued the conversation. "So, um, I was wondering, did you skip a few grades?"

"Huh?"

"Well it's just that you look too young to be in tenth grade."

Edward barely stopped himself from screaming at the boy about how not short he was. He had promised Roy and Riza he would use self-control while on this mission. Instead, he said in a firm voice. "I'm _fifteen_."

"Really?" Haruhi looked surprised. "You're just really small I guess."

"I am _not_ small!" So much for self-control.

Haruhi jumped, then looked a little confused by his small outburst. "Uh, sorry."

Ed quickly returned to his plate, ducking his head slightly and feeling a little bad for screaming at the only kid who had spoken to him that day.

Edward restarted the conversation a moment later and the two chatted for a few more minutes until they finished their lunch. Once he was done, Haruhi stood and picked up his tray.

"Well I guess I'll see you around." He said with a small smile. "And if you come looking for me, I'm usually with those idiots over there." Haruhi pointed to a group of rambunctious teens at a table across the cafeteria.

Ed looked where Haruhi was pointing and quickly recognized two of the boys in the group; they were identical twins who were in a few of his classes. All the others looked older, except for one who Ed assumed was one of the teen's younger brother.

"Okay," Ed replied, turning back to face Haruhi. He raised his hand in a quick wave as his new friend walked off.

* * *

After lunch, Ed was on his way to his next class when something a student said caught his attention.

"Hey, where's Brook?"

Edward froze. _Brook? As in Brooklyn Connor?_ He glanced behind him and saw a group of girls chatting. With his back turned and pretending to do something with his book bag, Ed listened attentively to their conversation.

"Brooklyn?" Another girl said. "I haven't seen her all morning."

A third girl gasped. "Oh, I completely forgot to tell you! Brook called me this morning, she's just getting over a cold so she can't be here today."

"Oh Sara," one of the girls giggled, "You forget everything, don't you?"

Now that the conversation had changed its course, Ed continued walking as he tapped the button on the earpiece to turn it on.

"Colonel!" Edward hissed.

Roy answered almost immediately. "What is it, Fullmetal?"

"You'll never believe this!" Ed said as quietly as he could manage. "The Connor kid isn't here!"

"What do you mean she isn't there?"

"I just heard some girls talking, they said she's home sick."

The colonel sighed in frustration. "Great."

"Can I leave then? There's no point in being here if that girl isn't!" Ed said.

Roy replied, "No, it would look suspicious if the new student leaves halfway through his first day."

A pause.

"Oh no, I suddenly feel _extremely_ ill."

"_No_, Edward, you're staying! Just keep an eye on her friends, see if they say anything else about her."

Ed groaned dramatically. "_Fine_."

* * *

"I told you I should have just left!"

In his first class after talking to Roy, Edward quickly spotted the three girls who had been talking about Brooklyn. The rest of the day he keep on eye and ear on them, but they never mentioned her again. Now he was walking home and had been complaining for several minutes to the colonel how the rest of the day had been uneventful.

"Today was a complete waste, I could have been doing something else useful!" Edward continued. "If she's not there again tomorrow, I'm leaving!"

Ed expected to Roy to yell back that he would absolutely _not_ leave tomorrow, but he was met with silence.

"Mustang?"

No response.

"_Did you freaking hang up on me?!_" Again receiving no answer, Ed angrily yanked the earpiece off and shoved it down in his book bag.

* * *

"Did you just turn that off while he was talking?"

Roy grinned at the lieutenant and said happily, "Yup. I got tired of listening to him."

Riza rolled her eyes but couldn't help but smile. "You know you're going to get an earful when he gets back."

"Yes, I know." Roy sighed, "Maybe I should hide?"

"After you wash the dishes."

The colonel raised an eyebrow at her. "Did my subordinate just give me a command?"

"I'm making you dinner, so you're washing the dishes. Equivalent exchange, isn't that one of your alchemy rules?" Riza replied with a small smirk as she stood up from the living room couch.

Roy chuckled, "Alright, you got me there. But Ed does dishes after dinner."

* * *

_Slam!_

Roy looked over his shoulder from his position at the sink. "Ed?"

It had been several minutes since he'd decided to ignore Edward's rambling and shut his earpiece off. The colonel had been expecting Ed to stomp over to him and throw a fit about him hanging up as soon as he'd gotten home.

Roy listened to the teen trudge up the stairs as he finished the dishes, then headed toward the stairs after him. He stopped right before the first step when he stepped on Edward's light blue jacket on the floor. With an irritated sigh, Roy bent down and picked it up. He only made it up the next two steps when he noticed Ed's tie on the stairs. Roy snatched it up, then lifted his head and discovered more clothing strewn about the rest of the stairs.

_Did he undress before he even got to his room?_ Roy thought as he picked up Ed's shoes, shirt and gloves as he walked up the stairs. Once at the top, he followed the short trail of socks to Edward's room.

Roy stopped in the doorway. "Tired?" he asked.

Ed was lying face-down on his bed, on top of the covers, in only slacks and an undershirt. Lifting his head slightly from the pillow so he could be understood, he said "Wake me when there's food."

* * *

Edward was up bright and early again the next morning, and after some breakfast, was sent off to school.

Once at school and in his first class, he quickly scanned the room, looking for Brooklyn Connor. He spotted her to his left with the three girls who had been talking about her the day before.

As expected, she looked just like she did in the photo he had seen of her. She was tall and slender, with short light brown hair and bright green eyes.

"Is she there today? Have you seen her yet?" Roy's voice suddenly came through the earpiece.

"Yup," Ed replied quietly.

"Good, keep an eye on her and try to make friends as soon as possible. Report to me immediately if you find out anything important."

"Got it,"

After chatting with Haruhi for a few minutes, class started and Brook sat at the desk that was to the left and one row in front of Ed's, giving him an easy view of her.

At the beginning of their next class, Brooklyn was again with the same group of girls. Ed watched the girls and listened to their giggling for a few minutes, and right when he decided he was going to go talk to Brooklyn, he noticed them repeatedly glancing at him. Curious, he observed a little longer, and heard one of the girls say "Just talk to him!" The other girls agreed with her and moments later the group was heading toward him.

Once close to his desk, one of the girls pushed Brooklyn to the front of their group. She was pink in the face and seemed a bit reluctant to speak.

"Um, hi," She said, breaking out a shy smile. "I'm Brooklyn."

"I'm Sara," The short brunette to her right added.

The girl with long blonde hair behind Brook said, "And I'm Kylee,"

"Torri," the fourth girl said. She had long, dark blonde hair. "You're the new student, right? We figured we'd introduce ourselves. Right, Brookie?" Torri elbowed Brook playfully.

"Yeah," Brook smiled with more confidence.

"Cool," Ed grinned back. This was easy, she came right to him! "I'm Edward, but just Ed is fine."

"And you can just call me Brook if you want." Brook replied.

"Okay," Before Ed could say anything else, the bell rang, and everyone started heading back to their desks.

"I'll talk to you later, okay?" Brooklyn said quickly, but left before she could get an answer.

Edward didn't manage to talk to Brooklyn again for the rest of the day.

Later as he was heading for the exit to leave, he noticed Brook and her friends entering a room with a lot of sounds coming from inside.

_After school club or something? Could be an opportunity to spend more time with her._ Ed thought. He followed the girls and stopped outside the door, looking up at the sign above it.

"Third Music Room…" he read quietly to himself. He shrugged, reached for the large golden door handle, and opened the door.

_"Welcome to the Host Club!"_

* * *

Author's Note:

Kinda boring chapter :/

I'm so sorry this took forever! It's been a super busy summer and I'd been having major laptop troubles on top of that. But now, I have a brand spankin' new laptop so we won't have that problem again!

But I'll be honest with you guys. I have never been to school a day in my life. I've always been homeschooled, so all I know about schools is from TV, books, and friends! (What is a school period? What is homeroom?) So if something sounds off or I left out something important that should be mentioned, please let me know in a review or PM. :)

…I just realized Ed's undercover name Edward Coleman sounds a lot like Edward Cullen. *facepalm* I DID NOT MEAN TO DO THAT. BLEH.

Oh also, all the girls in Brook's little entourage are named after my real life best friends, although with different name spellings. (Sara=Sarah, Kylee=Kylie, Torri=Tori) :D I don't plan on them being super big characters, but I had the idea and thought it'd be cool to do that.

Please review guys! And hopefully it won't take me this long next time to update ^^;


	3. Chapter 3: Meet the Host Club

_Chapter 3, Meet the Host Club!_

_"Welcome to the Host Club!"_

Upon opening the door, Edward was greeted by a familiar group of seven smiling teens. They were all posed around a chair that a tall blond boy was sitting in. After a moment, the smiles changed to looks of surprise.

"Oh, you're not a girl." The one in the chair said. He had long, light blond hair with soft waves, and bluish-purples eyes that vaguely reminded Ed of the homunculi's deep purple eyes.

"Edward?"

Ed's eyes snapped immediately to a recognizable face he hadn't noticed was there. "Haruhi? What are you doing here?"

He took a second to look around, gaping at the fancy room filled with young girls waiting in couches and chairs. "Wherever here is…" He turned his attention back to the boys in front of him. "What is this place?"

The tall blond in the chair smiled. "_This_, is the Ouran High School Host Club!" He started dramatically, gesturing to the room with his arms. "The Ouran Host Club is where the school's _handsomest_ boys with too much time on their hands—"

Haruhi rolled his eyes, "Here we go again,"

"—entertain young ladies who also have _way_ too much time on their hands. Just think of it of Ouran Academy's elegant playground for the super-rich and beautiful!"

"_Host_ Club?" Ed asked at the end of the boy's speech. This was _not_ what he had been expecting.

"Yes!" The blond replied. "So what brings you here?"

Before he could answer, another boy, a tall dark-haired one with glasses, said "You're the new student, aren't you? I haven't seen you before."

"New student?" The blond in the chair asked.

Twin red-heads nodded, then replied in unison. "Yeah, he's in a few of our classes. Right, Haruhi?"

"Yeah," Haruhi walked up to Edward and introduced him to the group. "This is Edward. He's an honor student like I am."

"Really?" The blond, leaned forward in his seat excitedly. "Does that make him a commoner, too? Amazing!"

He stood from his chair, and walked up to Ed. "Welcome to Ouran Academy," he said, bowing grandly. "I am Tamaki Suoh, the king of the Host Club! The ladies call me the Princely Type."

"This is Kyoya Ootori," Tamaki said, pointing to the black haired boy wearing glasses over his dark eyes. "He is the Cool Type. These are the twins, Hikaru and Kaoru Hitachiin." He gestured to the two red-heads. "They are the Little Devil Types."

Before Tamaki could continue, the short host with blond hair and coffee-colored eyes ran up to them. "I'm Hunny, and this is my Usa-chan!" Hunny held a stuffed pink rabbit right up to Edward's face, causing him to jerk back in surprise.

"This is Mitsukuni Haninozuka, or just Hunny. He's our Loli-Shota Type," Tamaki said.

"Mitsukuni, you should give him some space." A deep voice said, walking up to Hunny. Ed had to tilt his head way back just to look at the face of the tall, black-haired, brown-eyed teenager.

"Oops, sorry!" Hunny said, taking the bunny away from Ed's face and hugging it to his chest.

"This is Takashi Morinozuka, the Strong, Silent Type. We all call him Mori. And I believe you've already met Haruhi, our Natural Type." Tamaki said.

"Wait," Edward said, "What's this "type" thing?"

"All girls aren't the same, my little honor student." Tamaki explained, patting Edward lightly on his head. "They all like different types of men. So, to properly entertain, we must offer a variety of types for them to choose from."

"Oh…" Ed said, after shoving Tamaki's hand away.

"What are you doing here, Ed?" Haruhi asked.

"Oh, well, I was wondering… How often does that girl, Brooklyn, come here?" Edward questioned, pointing out Brooklyn.

"Brooklyn Connor?" Kyoya asked. "She's a regular. She and her friends are here nearly every day."

Suddenly, a familiar voice spoke loudly in Ed's ear. "Join the club!"

Ed jumped in surprise, then quickly said to the hosts, "One sec," He backed up about six feet and turned around. "You were listening in? What do you want?" he hissed quietly.

"What I want," Roy said through the earpiece, "Is for you to join that club!"

"_What!?_ No, I can't be a _host_!"

"Yes, you can, and you _will_. Now get back over there and ask to join!" Roy ordered.

"Alright!" Ed growled, then turned over and walked up to Tamaki, ignoring the confused looks on everyone's faces.

"Tamaki, I," he hesitated. _I really don't want to do this!_ "I want to join the host club and become a host!"

The boys were silent, surprised by Ed's sudden request.

Tamaki spoke first, breaking the momentary silence. "You want to become a host, huh? You know, not just anyone could be a host."

"Okay, so what do I have to do?" Edward asked.

"Well, to start, you have to be handsome enough." Tamaki said, walking closer to Ed. "Hikaru, Kaoru!" He snapped his fingers and motioned for the twins to follow him.

"Wait, what?" Ed's face started turning red as Tamaki grabbed his chin, tilting it up to better examine him.

"Hmm, golden eyes. Unique, the ladies will like that." Tamaki said after a moment.

The twins nodded in agreement. "They'll like the freckles, too." Kaoru added.

"Blond hair is pretty common, though." Hikaru said, lifting a small clump of Ed's bangs, then letting it fall back to his face.

"Yes, but most guys don't let it grow as long as his. I think the girls will love it." Tamaki said. He dropped Edward's face and took a step back, putting his hand to his chin thoughtfully as he continued to observe him. As he did, the twins each grabbed an arm.

"Hey!" Ed struggled against the twins, but they ignored him.

"Nice build, fairly muscular." Hikaru said, holding Ed's left arm tight.

"…This arm is hard. Like, too hard to be an arm." Kaoru said.

"What?" Hikaru reached for Ed's right arm, but Ed yanked his arm away.

The hosts were all staring, looking curious.

"It's just a prosthetic arm, okay?" Ed pushed the sleeve of his coat up the slightest bit, showing his automail wrist. "I got in a bad accident when I was a kid."

No one spoke for a moment and Edward thought, _Well there goes my chance._

"That's perfect!" Tamaki suddenly exclaimed, "A tragic childhood backstory of how you lost your arm, oh, the ladies will eat this up!"

Ed jerked his arm away when Tamaki tried to grab it for a closer look. "Really?"

"Yes! And I'd say you pass the good-looks test. Now we just need to know how you are with the—"

"Edward!"

A familiar group of girls running up to Ed cut Tamaki's sentence short.

"Hi Ed!" Brooklyn greeted with a smile as she and her friends stopped in front of him.

"Brooklyn!" Ed was happily surprised. _She just keeps coming to me, this is easy!_

Torri asked, "What are you doing here?"

"Are you going to be a new host or something?" Kylee inquired excitedly before Edward got a chance to answer.

"Well-" Ed started to say, but Tamaki spoke up.

"Would you girls like it if Edward were a host?"

"Yes!" All four girls chimed at once, nodding their heads eagerly.

"Is he really going to be?" Sara questioned.

"He should be, he'd make a great host!" Brook said.

"Oh, please Tamaki?" Pleaded Torri.

Tamaki looked thoughtfully at the girls, then at Edward, as they all eagerly awaited his answer.

"Edward," he started.

"Yes?"

"…I have a good feeling about you." Tamaki said with a smile, then continued grandly, "The King has made his decision! Tomorrow will be your first official day as a host!"

The girls immediately cheered and celebrated.

Edward smiled, "Great!" _Just great…_

* * *

After the short walk home, Ed entered the house, noticing the complete silence instantly.

"Hello?" He called softly as he set his book bag down by the front door. Walking into the living room, he spotted Roy fast asleep on the couch. He continued to walk through the house in search of Riza.

Finding the rest of the home empty, he strolled back into the living room, figuring Riza had gone out grocery shopping.

Ed stopped and stared at his superior's sleeping form. In Edward's mind, the peacefully snoozing Roy was practically screaming for him to do something to him. What a perfect opportunity for payback! _Thinks he can make me be some stupid host and get away with it…_

Ed ran quietly to his room upstairs and dropped on his knees in front of his bed. He reached under and pulled out his old, tattered suitcase. Ed opened it quickly and began to dig through its contents, hoping what he was looking for was still there. At the bottom, he found it: a small bottle of light blue nail polish. It was a gift for Winry he'd bought a few months ago. He'd planned to give it to her when he last visited, but he'd completely forgotten about it.

"I'm sure Winry won't mind if I borrow just a bit." Edward whispered to himself.

Clutching the nail polish in his flesh hand, he crept back downstairs and into the living room. Mustang was still sound asleep, sprawled out on the couch. Ed tip-toed to the end of the couch where Roy's feet where propped up on the arm. Carefully, he unscrewed the lid to the nail polish. Holding the bottle in his right hand and the brush in his left, he cautiously began painting the colonel's toenails. He had to bite down on his lip to keep his snickers from escaping and waking Roy.

Once he had finished, Edward stood back and admired his work. _Ah, I love revenge_. He thought, smirking evilly at his slumbering commanding officer.

Then Edward had another idea; it'd put the icing on the cake. After a quick search upstairs, Ed returned to the living room, camera in hand. He snapped a picture. _And now I have blackmail, too!_

* * *

"—then when he woke up and noticed it, he was _so_ mad! I seriously thought he was going to kill me! And the best part is, Hawkeye thinks it's funny too, so she won't tell him he needs special nail polish remover to get it off!"

Edward was sitting on his bed, grinning ear-to-ear as he retold the day's earlier events to Alphonse over the phone.

"You're so _mean_, Brother!" Al managed to say between giggles.

"Well he deserved it! You'll _never_ believe what he made me do at school today…"

"What?" Al asked curiously.

"He made me join a host club! And just 'cause that Brooklyn girl goes there a lot." Ed exclaimed.

"Host club? What's that?" asked Alphonse.

"It's the _stupidest_ thing in the _world_, that's what." Ed answered as he flopped onto his back on the bed. "It's like, all the members are guys, and all they do is talk to girls and entertain them or whatever every day after school. They each have their own "type" and the girls pick which one they want to be entertained by."

"Well, that doesn't sound so bad, Brother. What's the problem?" Alphonse asked.

"What do you mean, 'what's the problem'? It's stupid and boring. Who wants to spend their entire afternoon just talking to girls?" Edward said crossly.

"Ooooh, I get it now." Alphonse said, amusement evident in his voice.

"Get what?"

"You're worried about talking to a bunch of _girls_, huh Brother?" Al asked in a sort of teasing tone.

Ed's felt his face flush as he yelled into the phone, "_No_, I'm _not_!"

"It's okay, Ed, just be yourself, and be nice, and you'll do fine!"

"I already told you, I'm not worried about that! Geez… I just don't want to spend all of my free time after school doing something dumb." Ed said.

"Well, the more time you spend finding out stuff about that girl, the sooner the mission will be over." Al pointed out.

Edward sighed. "Guess you're right, Al… It's getting late, I should head to bed."

"Okay, Brother. I'll talk to you later!" Alphonse said.

"'kay," Ed replied, stifling a yawn.

"And good luck with the girls, try not to break any hearts!" Al joked.

"Oh, shut up!"

* * *

The next day, Edward could think of nothing but the host club. School went by quickly and uneventfully, and soon it was time to meet with the hosts before they opened their club to the girls.

Edward stood in front of the Third Music Room door, wishing he didn't have to go in. With a small shake of his head, Ed reached forward and grabbed the large handle. _I hate the colonel so much…_

"Well, look who it is!" Tamaki's jovial voice greeted, "Our newest little host!"

_"Don't call me little_!" Ed immediately barked.

Tamaki ignored his little outburst and asked, "Excited for you first day?"

_No._ "Yeah, of course,"

As girls started showing up, Edward stood back and watched as the other hosts greeted them, feeling awkward and out-of-place. Once the place was filled with girls, Tamaki snatched Ed by the arm and led him to the center of the room.

"Alright, ladies, I have an important announcement!" Tamaki declared loudly, immediately grabbing the attention of everyone in the room. "I'd like to introduce you all to our new host, Edward Coleman!"

All eyes in the room stared at Ed with interest and curiosity.

Tamaki continued, "For now, his type is undecided, but will be announced tomorrow. Though I know you all have your regular hosts you usually sit with, I'd like it if some of you gave Ed a chance."

After his little speech, Tamaki sent Ed off to a small section of couches, where he was quickly joined by several girls, including Brooklyn and a few of her friends.

For a few moments, Ed could do nothing but stare at the girls surrounding him. They all stared at him, eagerly waiting for him to say something, but he had no idea what.

"Um, hi." Ed started lamely, "Like Tamaki said, I'm Edward, but just Ed is fine."

Each girl quickly introduced herself individually, ending with Brook, who said, "And I'm Brook, but you already knew that. Now enough about us, we want to know about you!"

"Okay, well, what do you want to know?" Edward asked.

The girls immediately bombarded him with questions, asking rapidly and nearly speaking over each other, not even giving Ed time to answer.

"How old are you?"

"Do you have any siblings?"

"How long have you let your hair grow? It's so long!"

"Where are you from? I've never seen eyes like that before!"

"Since you're a commoner, do you drink commoner's coffee?"

It took a second for him to process all the questions, but once he did he answered them all quickly. "I'm 15, I'm an only child, I haven't cut my hair in four years, I'm from Amestris but I think I have family from other places, and… commoner's coffee?"

The girl who asked about the coffee nodded. "It's coffee that's already ground. Commoners drink it!"

"Yeah, Haruhi brought us some when he first joined the Host Club!" another girl added.

"Oh, then yeah, I have."

The conversation carried on and Edward was surprised at how easy it all was; he was mainly just answering questions. Al was right, just being himself was making the girls happy.

His joy in the simplicity of entertaining the girls was short-lived when the red-headed girl sitting at his right side noticed his wrist.

Spotting something shiny, she asked, "Oh, do you have a watch or something?" She took his arm and pushed down the sleeve for a closer look.

Edward froze as he heard the girls around him gasp.

Brooklyn broke the silence first. "Is that automail?" she asked.

"Yeah…I, um, got in a bad accident when I was a kid and lost my arm and leg." Edward said.

Ed was afraid of how they would all react. He'd received many mixed reactions over the years when people found out about his prosthetics. Some people didn't mind the automail, but some seemed scared of it, or thought he was some kind of cyborg freak.

"Your leg, too? Oh, you poor dear!" cried one girl.

"It must have been terrible!" another said.

Oh, yes. There were also those who pitied him, which it seemed was the case for these girls.

"I'm fine, really!" Ed assured them, "Well, at first it was pretty tough, but I'm okay now."

"You're so brave!" The redhead gushed, and the girls heartily agreed with her.

Edward shrugged, as if it were nothing, grinning ear-to-ear. "Nah, not really. Lots of people get automail."

The rest of Ed's time at the host club was spent discussing nothing but his automail. The girls' pity quickly changed to curiosity and fascination and they asked Ed question after question about his arm and leg. Ed even took off his jacket and rolled up his sleeve and pants leg to give them a closer look. Once he did, more girls surrounded him, intrigued by his shiny artificial limbs.

During the last twenty minutes or so before the girls had to head home, Ed had grabbed the attention of everyone in the room. As more questions were asked, he had to quickly make up a story about a train accident when he was eleven that caused him to lose his limbs.

* * *

Once he had said his farewells to the girls and they had all left, Tamaki came up to Edward with a huge smile on his face. "Well, someone got popular quite quickly, huh?" He turned to the other hosts behind him and said, "Told you he would, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did and you were right." Kyoya agreed. "I've already had several girls request him for tomorrow. You are going to continue coming, correct?"

Ed nodded. "Yeah, this was actually a lot more fun than I thought it would be."

Tamaki suddenly grabbed Ed in a tight hug, lifting him off the ground. "Oh, Daddy's so proud of his newest little host!"

"Hey, let go!" Ed yelled, trying to free himself from Tamaki's arms. "_And who are you calling a micro-sized bean!?_"

Tamaki acted oblivious to his struggling and continued to cuddle the smaller teen until he remembered something. "Oh, I almost forgot! We need a type for you!" he said, finally setting Ed back down on his feet and releasing him.

"How about the Loud and Obnoxious Type?" Kyoya suggested sarcastically, earning a glare from Ed as he quickly moved several feet away from Tamaki.

"I'm _not_ obnoxious!" Ed protested.

"He can be the Robot Type!" Hunny exclaimed, running up to Ed and grabbing his automail arm.

"I am not a robot!" Ed yelled, yanking his arm away.

"The Immature Type," Haruhi proposed.

"Or the Short Type," Hikaru said with a grin, standing with his twin behind Ed and patting his head to emphasize his lack of height.

Ed whirled around quickly, and, unsure which twin spoke, grabbed them both by their shirt collars. "_I am not short!"_

"More like the Aggressive Type," Kaoru said to his brother. Edward dropped Hikaru's collar and raised his first threateningly at Kaoru, growling angrily.

"Alright, I've got it!" Tamaki abruptly shouted, immediately snatching everyone's attention. "Edward will be our…" he paused for dramatic effect, "Bad Boy Type!"

Ed dropped his fist and let go of Kaoru's collar. "Bad boy?" he said, raising a blond eyebrow.

"Yes," Tamaki replied, looking quite proud of his decision. "I think it fits you very well."

"Bad boy." Edward said again. "Well, if you say so." He didn't think it fit him well at all, but it was better than the others' suggestions so he decided not to argue.

"Um, guys?" Hikaru suddenly said. "Isn't there something we're forgetting to tell him?" He and Kaoru looked at Haruhi expectantly.

Tamaki replied before Haruhi could. "Oh yeah, we did forget about that. Well, Ed," he started, turning to the small blond, "This is secret and you can't tell anyone, but Haruhi is actually a girl."

_To be continued…_

* * *

**Special Bonus Scene!**

_After the other girls left, Brook and Ed were by themselves and could finally talk together alone._

"Oh, Edo-kun, I'm so glad we finally get some time alone!" Brooklyn excited gushed.

"Me too, Brookie-chan." Edward replied, gently grasping her hands and gazing passionately into her dazzling green eyes.

"I have something to tell you." Ed continued. "I know we just met, but I feel I can trust you with my deepest secrets. The reason I have this arm is not because of an accident, it's because I am an alchemist and I committed the greatest taboo: human transmutation!"

Ed released her hands and dramatically turned away in shame.

"Oh Edo-kun, I have something to confess as well!" Brook said, cupping Ed's cheek with her hand and turning his face toward her.

"I have automail too, both arms!" Brooklyn removed her gloves, revealing two automail hands.

Ed gasped, "Brookie-chan, how?"

"I also committed the taboo." The girl admitted.

"I didn't even know you're an alchemist!" Edward exclaimed.

Brook nodded. "I am! In fact, I'm a state alchemist. The Super Awesome Emerald Alchemist! I joined the military when I was five."

"Wow, I joined when I was twelve and I thought that was impressive!" Ed said. "Why were you given the title Super Awesome Emerald Alchemist?"

Brooklyn rolled her eyes. "Because it sounds cool, of course! My, Edo-kun, we have a lot in common, don't we?"

"Yes, we do! Brookie-chan, all this has made me realize…" Ed trailed off, turning away slightly as a light blush spread across his handsome face.

"What, Edo-kun?"

Edward rejoined their hands and whispered romantically, "I love you."

"Me too… Let's get married."

"'Kay."

And so, Edo-kun and Brookie-chan got married (even though they're only like fifteen,) and lived happily ever after. THE END.

* * *

Author's Note:

LOL okay okay, that "bonus" scene was just me being silly :D I think I've been reading too much of Mird's fanfiction recently…

Bleeeh, I pretty much hate this whole chapter. There's like a few scenes that I like, but that's it. D:

I couldn't resist throwing in what I guess you can call a little head cannon… In my head, Ed has a freckley face, and I often draw him with freckles. Why? 'Cause freckles are freakin' adorable, that's why. (Two of my younger siblings just recently in the last few years got all freckle-faced. IT'S SO CUTE.) Plus, with all the traveling and stuff he does I'd assume he's outside a lot and gets plenty of sun.

GUYS. THERE'S LIKE, 30 REVIEWS. THERE ARE TWO PAGES OF REVIEWS. Thank you _so_ much! I hardly replied to the ones from Chapter 1, but now I've been replying to each one! Except for the guest reviews, which I still appreciate just as much! Thanks guys! (Also, special thanks to the guest reviewer who explained what a school period and what homeroom are. :) And to the guest who's looking for a suave Ed, I'm sorry but you probably won't get that here! Edward's always seemed more dorky than suave to me XD)

Teeheehee, I always start giggling when I write Tamaki :D He's so silly and fun! And yes I memorized his little speech from the first episode. I REGRET NOTHING.

Anyways, please review and tell me what you think! :)


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